I think I’m at the point where I’m learning the best ways to deal with everything going on in my life. I’ve changed the way I react to things by thinking about what I’m going to say or do before I do it. Right now that’s the only way that I know works for me. I’m doing better in school even though my grades don’t show it yet. I’ve been getting more of my work done so that’s going to help. Also I have been doing better at home; well at least that’s what I think. Sometimes when I’m laying down thinking about everything I’ve done, I wonder if it would better if I had done things different. You can’t change the past, so I’m going to look towards the future.
I miss my mom like crazy, but I know she would want me to do great in life. I just got to step up and handle my business. There are people that care about me and these are the same people that encourage me to do well in everything I do. These people tell me everything happens for a reason, but sometimes the reason is unclear to me. I guess with time ill possibly know and understand the reason.
I’ve noticed that in my life that when things start to get better and go up somehow, they always get worse and go back down. Even though I’m pretty sure that’s just the way of life, I don’t like it at all. Why do people like me have to struggle? Why can’t things just be easier? None of this makes sense to me, but maybe that’s because of my age. Hopefully when I get older all my questions can get answered…